Illusions And Change
Today I was drawn to my blog....but...refreshingly enough its not because I am seething over the politics going on in our country or the rest of the world...no...today....my blog appealed to me like a sanctuary, a haven just for me.
I started medical school today.
It was great...all that I had imagined and so much more. I think the best part is that this time I have no illusions..well...maybe a little but certainly not the great expectations that come with starting over in a new place. Medicine is going to be overwhelming. Its going to push me beyond my limits. It will make me fall over and over again....and no matter how eager or passionate I may be...the storm will still hit me. I just hope I am strong enough for it.
So, now that I am relatively free from illusions, I am still in need of a sanctuary...because there is a change in my life...and change is always both exciting but it also makes you fearful. You are constantly aware of being pulled in different directions. No matter how much you may like change or crave it....you can still find it hard to welcome it with open arms. But I guess that's what makes us humans.We learn to welcome it, cherish it even and then ready ourselves for more.
This blog is who I am. Its the person I was and the person I have become. These musings, no matter how depressing or 'serious' they are, they are my way of looking at the bigger picture. There's a whole world out there. Its a dark place for many but there are always those who strive to find a light in the dark. I hope I can be one of them...my first step is to step out of my own little world, to expand my horizon, to make peace with the darkness and finally to welcome the light.
I started medical school today.
It was great...all that I had imagined and so much more. I think the best part is that this time I have no illusions..well...maybe a little but certainly not the great expectations that come with starting over in a new place. Medicine is going to be overwhelming. Its going to push me beyond my limits. It will make me fall over and over again....and no matter how eager or passionate I may be...the storm will still hit me. I just hope I am strong enough for it.
So, now that I am relatively free from illusions, I am still in need of a sanctuary...because there is a change in my life...and change is always both exciting but it also makes you fearful. You are constantly aware of being pulled in different directions. No matter how much you may like change or crave it....you can still find it hard to welcome it with open arms. But I guess that's what makes us humans.We learn to welcome it, cherish it even and then ready ourselves for more.
This blog is who I am. Its the person I was and the person I have become. These musings, no matter how depressing or 'serious' they are, they are my way of looking at the bigger picture. There's a whole world out there. Its a dark place for many but there are always those who strive to find a light in the dark. I hope I can be one of them...my first step is to step out of my own little world, to expand my horizon, to make peace with the darkness and finally to welcome the light.
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